PrinceWatercress plays Alice in Wonderland (GBC) - Part 1 of 6

This is probably one of the last things I would expect to be turned from an animated Disney movie into a full-fledged video game, but somehow Digital Eclipse made it work, and on the Game Boy Color, at that. The result is something that is surprisingly solid but is also relatively obscure due to everything else that was coming out on the Game Boy Color and other consoles at the same time. At least it reviewed alright.

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I barely remember the Game Boy Color "Get Into It" commercial for this game. I may have seen it; I may have not. Nevertheless, there was one. The game itself? After playing it, it's...strangely good?

You have up to three save files to work with in this game. If you need to delete one, press the Select button. When starting a new game, you must input your initials with the D-Pad and confirm with A.

The game begins with Alice sitting in the tree daydreaming as her teacher reads from a history book. All of a sudden, a white rabbit carrying a pocket watch runs into a burrow, looking extremely late for something. Press A to get through the text prompts, which come with the animation of falling cards revealing the text from left to right.)

From here, you'll take control of Alice. Left and Right on the D-Pad move left and right, Down ducks, and A jumps. You can run by holding the B button. This first part is simple; just head to the right and jump from rock to rock once you make it to the river. After going far enough, you'll catch up with the white rabbit - known as The White Rabbit - and from here, you'll go down the rabbit hole. At this point, you'll start getting hints on what to do from the Cheshire Cat.

While falling down the rabbit hole, you can move around with the D-Pad, and you can also use Up to slow your rate of descent. The A button lets you descend faster when held down, but you'll want to go down to the end while hitting as few random objects that aren't gold stars as possible. The gold stars allow you to enter bonus areas when you collect 100 of them, although that won't become much of a priority until you reach Wonderland.

You have five hit points, and you can collect papers with "1/5" on them to refill them. If you lose all of your hit points, you'll end up at the game over screen, but thankfully, you have infinite continues. The game is meant for a general audience, after all.

You'll eventually reach the bottom, and when you do, you'll enter the hallway leading towards Wonderland. You'll run into the Cheshire Cat, who will cryptically explain that the mushrooms will change you from big to small to big again, and when you change size, the pitch of the music gets higher and lower depending on your size (and it definitely gets higher when you're small to the point where it can be a bit grating). You'll also see a lot of platforms moving either vertically or horizontally; be ready to jump onto them and take a ride to wherever they go.

If you see any enemies such as the frogs, you can jump on them when they are on the ground to defeat them. You also must be big in order to defeat them; if you're small, you'll simply bounce off the top of them.

The cyan and white sections of the floors are trap doors that drop you down a level if you stand on them for a second. 

The paintings of the soldiers will carry spears that move up and down. If the tips of the spears touch you in any way, you will lose a hit point. Halfway across the spears section, the Cheshire Cat will tell you that you can perform running jumps to jump further by jumping as you run.

The key allows you to open the brown wooden door with the doorknob at the end of the current section. If you reach a wooden door without a key, you'll have to backtrack and find the key.

Further down the hallway section, you'll see tea cups and tea kettles spinning around as they fly in a certain direction. You can jump on the tea kettles to defeat them, and while you can also destroy the tea cups in the same fashion, they are a little harder to hit due to their size. 

The running pocket watch enemy can be jumped on, but this enemy is rather fast, so be ready to jump on it when it suddenly shows up.

If you collect all of the stars in an area, the Cheshire Cat will tell you when you collect the last one. You'll also get a full heal and have five hit points again, which is pretty nice.

The hallway has multiple sections, and while you won't see much new in the second section, you will see plenty of mushrooms and plenty of running pocket watches. There are also multiple keys, and you'll need to collect them all to get through each section one at a time.

The macaron enemies act much like the frog enemies from earlier; jump on them when they are on the ground to defeat them.

The third hallway section starts with the Cheshire Cat warning you about the tricky floors, even though you've probably found out about them the hard way two sections ago. You'll also be jumping from platform to platform a lot at the beginning, too.

The spinning yellow thing near where the tea cups and tea kettles are actually spinning pocket watches, although I had no idea what they were while playing this game.

There is a wall that you can get through while you are small when you reach the area above the start. If you go into that area, you'll find a teapot. The teapot allows you to unlock things for the photo album mode that can be used with the Game Boy Printer, and there are eight teapots in in all. Don't forget to grab it!

After you get through the third section, you'll face an angry, running pocket watch that is larger than the ones you've previously faced. While you can jump on him to damage him, there are birds that will fly out from the side and give you one of two icons: an "I" icon that gives you temporary invincibility and an icon with a down arrow on it that does damage to the boss. I ended up grabbing a ton of these and destroying the boss in about a minute.

From here, Alice starts crying because she cannot catch the White Rabbit, and this leads to her flooding the room and travelling across the river she has just made in a bottle. Your only controls are Left and Right on the D-Pad to steer left and right, respectively. If you run into an octopus tentacle, or if you run into a rock formation at a fast enough speed, you'll get a game over screen and you'll be forced to play this section again from the beginning. Any of the white glowing areas are currents that will push your upwards faster. You'll get a "!" symbol at the top center of the screen if you are approaching a hazard, and this is your only cue to move around to avoid being nabbed. For some reason, staying to the far left for most of this section will make it easier to get to the end. I wish I knew why.

When you finally complete the bottle section, you'll wash ashore in Wonderland and pop out of the bottle. From here, you've reached the meat of the game...

PrinceWatercress plays Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Part 6 of 6

...and with this, we complete our adventure. 

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Stage 6

Map (by StarFighters76)

Believe it or not, the inside of the Technodrome isn't really that big. It shouldn't take you too long to find Shredder at all.

The jetpack guys aren't that hard at all. Just don't stand anywhere near them. When you see them in the narrow part of the yellow section, duck down so their lasers fly over your head, and attack any other enemy that comes your way. 

If Leonardo is at his last quarter of his health, his sword does double damage. I take advantage of this on purpose in order to heal Donatello on the way to Shredder.

The turrets stay destroyed even after you off-screen them.

In the blue section, I make my way down a little bit, then head left when I am able. Past the wall turret is a ladder leading down to full health.

Shredder is amazingly easy. Fight him off and make your way to the uppermost platform. If Shredder is at the bottom when you do this, you're golden. Hit him when he jumps towards you. Every time you hit him, you knock him back. He'll keep jumping towards you, but since you keep hitting him, he won't be able to do anything. 

Another thing you can do is hit Shredder from below with Don, then use any other turtle who has the scroll weapon equipped. Use the scroll weapon against Shredder and keep hitting him with it. He'll go down easily.

Shredder's only attack is his gun, which instantly kills your turtle if the projectile connects. Since he's strangely easy, the attack is never seen.

Congrats. You just completed one of the hardest NES games in existence.

PrinceWatercress plays Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Part 5 of 6

Well, I sure lucked out.

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Stage 5

Map (by StarFighters76)

Avoid the search lights of the planes in the overworld. If they spot you, you'll have to deal with some Foot Clan ninjas.

The crab-like robots that crawl on the walls are the worst. The boomerang sub-weapon as well as Donatello's bo will destroy them in one hit instead of two, which is a welcome sigh of relief because these things can be unmeasurably irritating.

The jellyfish split into four bubbles if you get too close to them, but (interestingly enough) you can hit the bubbles and actually destroy them.

The porcupines are really annoying, since they face away from you to attack and shoot needles at you when they do. After attacking twice, they'll run away.

Here's a problem that the Angry Video Game Nerd doesn't mention: you can only stand on the ladders on the walls when you climb all the way up on them. 

The underground parts are even worse, since you have cannons shooting at you from the ceiling and craning themselves up and down at the same time. You also have aliens that curl into balls and roll around like pillbugs on crack if they're not shooting sperm out of their mouths (I'm serious, that's actually what it looks like).

Anyway, the doors at the bottom of the underground areas are the possible places where you'll find the boss. You'll know that the boss isn't there if you enter the door and end up at a dead end room with absolutely nothing in it. Unfortunately, the building that houses the Technodrome is random each time you play. There is a chance that the empty room may contain a turtle that you may have lost.

When you finally meet up with the Technodrome, here's what you do: take out the Foot Clan ninjas as you wait for the electricity at the front of the Technodrome to stop sparking out, then head to the tank tread at the side and take out the turrets. Now that those are out of the way, attack the eye at the top of the Technodrome when it opens. You did it! Just one more stage to go!

PrinceWatercress plays Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Part 4 of 6

...and the game gets harder again. This one took a few tries before I could finally get through it without losing a turtle.

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Stage 4

Map (by StarFighters76)

Enter the building and prepare to take on the maze.

The fastest path is 1, 2, 4, 5, 7, 9, 12, 15, 17, 18. You can also substitute 5 and 7 with 3 and 6 respectively, then take 8, and head to 9 from there.

If you need to save one of your friends, enter 13, then get your friend and head back from where you came in. You can also exit 13 through the other side, go backwards into 12 and fully refill health for all your turtles. 

The first building you enter has a full health refill right off the bat. You'll also find some tightropes not long afterwards, and you'll need to use them very soon after. Just walk to the post where the rope is used and your Turtle will automatically tether up.

The robots that shoot lasers only attack when you do. 

Section 2 is really easy, just watch out for the lasers.

If you see any purple planes on the map, keep your distance. Those things are Shredder's bombers, and they can nuke you off of the map if you're not careful. It's best to stay away from them.

For Section 3, take short hops to get across the conveyor belts. At least the conveyor belts tell you off the bat where they're going to push you.

Section 4 introduces a new enemy: a humanoid that splits into two. (This assumes you haven't seen it earlier in Stage 3 like I did.) When you hit its smaller counterparts again, you'll get them to split even further. Those miniature clones take multiple hits before they die, which can make them frustratingly annoying.

Section 5 introduces the magnets. When you're in the air, they'll instantly attract your Turtle, which carries the risk of pulling you into the spikes while you're fine-tuning your jump placement. Thankfully, touching the spikes does not cause instant death, but it's still something you should avoid.

The road to the end is really nasty. You'll be dropping down for a few screens, and while they all have the same pattern as the first room, the second one introduces spiked walls of instant death, so you'll have to be fast on the way down. The third room is just like the second, but it has a full pizza that you definitely won't be able to get at all. Thanks, game.

The fire pits are instant death, so you'll want to avoid those. This is especially true near the end of 15, where enemies can push you into the fire pit if you're not careful.

The room at the end is the boss - a giant Mouser. Wait for it to blink its eyes twice before jumping to avoid the laser. After that, it will open its mouth and expose hit its "tongue." Once the mouth opens, you can easily strike the weak point with Donatello. There is a glitch where you can pause and then unpause when the mouth is open so that you can always hit the weak point no matter what, but you can easily beat this boss without it.

PrinceWatercress plays Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Part 3 of 6

Thankfully, the third stage is mercifully easier than the second.

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Stage 3

Map (by StarFighters76)

The Turtle Van has two weapons: the normal gun with infinite ammo that fires straight in front of the van (fired with the A button) and the super missiles that do more damage but come in finite amounts and have to be found (fired with the B button). Walk into it to enter it; press Select to get out.

The super missiles missiles can also destroy the barricades that block your path. From this point on, I'll actually be referring to the map, so you might want to have it open in a separate tab in case you actually want to know what I'm even talking about.

It should be noted that the Turtle Van's energy matches that of your current turtle. Yeah, that's right. It doesn't come with its own, separate energy bar. That's pretty lame.

First, enter the building immediately to the left of the starting point that you can enter (referred to as 1A on the map). As you make your way to the top, you can find a half pizza as well as a whole pizza that you can use to refresh your Turtles, and at the end you'll find Missiles. Walk over the pit to get over it and grab the Missiles. (Angry Video Game Nerd, anyone?)

Aside from the fleamen (who really do look like tiny astronauts) and the Foot Clan balloons that drop missiles when they're directly above, you also have robots that look like knights. These robots send their heads flying around the screen when you destroy them. Thankfully, the heads take only one hit to kill.

If you need more missiles, just exit and re-enter the building. Not only will the missiles be back, but so will the health power-ups. Bonus!

Now that you have some missiles, get back in the van and go to 4A and 4B from there. Stand near the center of the barricades in order to take out both halves in one shot with the missiles. Enter 4A, and pick up the icon at the upper-left corner that looks like some guy walking on a tightrope. This is the Rope, and you'll need it for later in the stage. Now enter 4B. If you have a Turtle down, this is where you'll be able to rescue him. Congrats, you've successfully regrouped. Now make your way to 6A.

If you need to refill health for any reason before heading to that area, or if you don't have a turtle to save, head to 3A. You're not only going to find health there, but you'll also find the Ninja Scroll as well as some tightropes. If you fall into the water in the sewer area, you'll end up on the other side of that area, but it'll just make it easier to get to the full heal pizza at the end.

When you're in the 6A area, don't fall into the water, because the Turtles can't swim. (Another first world problem brought to you by the Angry Video Game Nerd.) If you hit the drink, you'll have to start this whole area over. (Why they can't swim here when there was already a swimming level in the game before this is just inexplicable.) Let the robots with the detachable heads fall in the water, so you won't have to deal with them. Also, take short hops. That means "Don't do the somersault." 

From here, enter 7A. Make your way to the top, and you'll deal with the Mecha Turtle. (If you fall into the water before the end, you'll end up back at the 6A door, which means you'll have to do more backtracking just to get back to the end.) The first form just acts exactly like Leonardo, meaning that he acts exactly like you do. The second one is a robot Turtle with a jetpack and rockets that fire out of its mouth. If you're close to dying, switch to another Turtle. The first form isn't too hard, but avoid the rocket attacks of the second form. If you have the Ninja Scroll projectiles, use them. You'll take out both forms very quickly. When you save Splinter, you'll see Shredder's helicopter fly away.

PrinceWatercress plays Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Part 2 of 6

This is where a lot of people have trouble with the game...a lot.

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Stage 2

Map

Well, there's nothing else here to do on the overworld map at this point except to enter the building in front of you...so why not?

As your make your way up to the roof of the building, you'll be fighting mini-bosses each time you reach a ladder. Thankfully, they're enemies you've beaten before. You'll need to be right at the edge to make the final jump to the door leading to the top of the dam itself.

When you're at the top, move to the right and move off the broken end of the building. This is the Hudson River bomb level, and it's pretty nasty.

First things first: if your current Turtle is in danger of dying, switch to another character immediately. If the timer (two minutes and 20 seconds) goes to zero, it's an instant game over. However, if you die, the timer resets but the bombs don't! Epic win!

You have 2 minutes and 20 seconds to defuse eight bombs. Thankfully, there's a map for this that really helps out. When you get near a bomb, press B repeatedly to defuse it. Special music will play if you have only 20 seconds left.

With the rotating spikes, stay near the center to make it easier to not get hit. 

Wait for the electric barriers to stop running before moving past them, as they can do a lot of damage.

The currents can really drag you down at times, and sometimes they won't work due to a glitch in the programming. Sometimes they'll drag you down into the coral below, which act as spikes or electric barriers and cause damage as a result. As for the very stringy looking things at the bottom of some areas, don't get near it; you'll be dragged in and you'll immediately lose a turtle if you get close enough.

When you defuse all eight bombs, don't even worry about getting back to the beginning. You'll automatically return to the Turtles' home only to find the place trashed. Shredder will show up on the screen wearing a red wifebeater instead of his usual purple gear and has the ability to point his hand through the TV screen. You'll find out that Splinter has been kidnapped, and that the Stage 3 map is freakin' huge compared to the first two.

PrinceWatercress plays Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Part 1 of 6

Here's another game that I never thought I would beat until I tried it for the Internet. Long live the YouTube channel!

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The game is known as Gekikame Ninja Den in Japan, and Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles in Europe.

Stage 1

Map

The game starts in an overworld map. If you pause, you can select between the four Ninja Turtles, which have a different weapon (that of course, works differently). You'll have four turtles: Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael and Donatello. Each Turtle has a different weapon (katana, nunchaku, sai and bo staff, respectively), each with a different range. They all have their own individual health bars, and you can switch between them on the pause screen in case you're in trouble.

From what I understand, the first level is supposed to be Fifth Avenue and Greenwich Village.

The map shows red and white squares. The red squares are all the places you can access, while the white squares are an entrance to an area. The flashing dot signifies where you are. You'll be able to get hints from Splinter and/or April O'Neil (when you rescue her) in the message box below.

You'll start near a manhole. Go into it. Moving south past this area leads to a purple tank that will instantly try to kill you if you run into it, so don't do that.

You'll take on what look like Mousers and Foot Clan Ninjas. As you progress, some of them will have mini-boss status. Take them down to empty their life bars and continue on with the game. 

Whenever you finish off a mini-boss, move left past the center of the screen and continue. That way, you'll be able to see what's ahead and deal with it more easily.

You'll find a pizza at the end. The more slices there are on the icon, the more health you'll refill. One slice refills two squares on the life bar, and you'll see anywhere from one to four slices on a pizza icon.

From here, enter the manhole to the right of where you've come out. Go to the right and you'll face Bebop. Stay away from him and hit him from medium range. If you're using Donatello and his Bo, this is a lot easier. If you touch Rocksteady, you also take damage (I found this out by screwing around, don't ask).

When you beat Bebop, Rocksteady runs off with April through the nearby door. Enter it, and you'll come out across from where you entered. If you need health, go into the nearby house and beat up all the bats and stone guys. The stone guys can only be damaged if they're moving. You'll find a slice of pizza midway, followed by a whole pie at the end, and if one of your Turtles somehow need energy at this point, switch to that Turtle, get the Pizza, then switch back. That way, that whole pizza pie won't be wasted. Also, the chainsaw guy (should he show up) is totally violent for a NES game from 1987. Just saying.

Leave the house the same way you came in, then go to the manholes northwest of that house. Watch out for the steamrollers, as they're instant death if you touch them. There are also Foot Clan ninjas you can attack with the B button, just like in the side scrolling sections, should they get near you.

Before entering the one that blocks your path, enter the one south of it. You might find some throwing stars, which you can select with the Select button if you want to go back to your default weapon. There are several projectile weapons that you can find in the game, and if you don't want to grab a projectile weapon without losing the one you have, you can switch to another turtle and have that turtle pick it up. Weapons include throwing stars (a single shot and a three-way shot variety), boomerangs that can be thrown and grabbed again, and scrolls that can shoot an energy wave, among others. You'll find these weapons at random, so look sharp and be ready to press Select to switch back to your melee weapon as well as manage who carries what, as that can be pretty important.

In the manhole that I don't enter, the Turtle logo is invincibility. With this, your current Ninja Turtle spins around and hits everything that he touches for a few seconds. This will take down the frog mini-boss at the end without taking damage. Since this is a dead end, go back and climb up the ladder at the start.

Now you can go into the manhole that blocks your path. There's a pizza at the beginning in case somebody needs some health rations. Continue to the left, take care of the frog mini-boss, then climb up the ladder at the end and you'll come across this isolated blue building.

There are three sets of enemies in a stage, and if you don't like the one that's in the current area, you can leave where you came in from and immediately re-enter to spawn a different set. Nice.

You'll face Rocksteady at the building at the end, and if you jump up to the top of the boxes at the right-hand side and keep striking downwards, you'll be able to beat him without taking damage. This works especially well if you're using Donatello, as it's pretty hard to miss while doing this with him. Just wait for him to jump (horribly) and then hit him. Whenever Rocksteady jumps near the boxes, his hitbox extends a little bit, and you can hit him more easily. You just saved April O'Neil! Congrats!

Controls

Control Pad: Move (Up enters doors)

A button: Jump (side-scrolling only)

B button: Attack (use Up and Down to strike upward and downward, respectively)

Start: Pause (lets you see the map and switch Turtles)

Select: Switch weapons (side-scrolling), leave the Turtle Van (overworld)